You, as the Light-Finder, right NOW.

In this moment, yes, things are changing every day, it’s surreal and unsettling. 

Yet…

People are finding ways to connect with others with authenticity, empathy and heartfelt care in ways they didn’t three weeks ago, and maybe never have. 

Our planet and environment is getting a little break, with fewer cars on the road and planes in the air. 

My normally sleep-deprived, school-stressed kids are more rested than they’ve been in months. 

I’ve started writing again after months of not, sparked by an admired thought leader creating a virtual writing circle #QuarantineWritingHour for any writer to join, where I’ve restarted my words while connecting with acclaimed writers in ways that just weren’t possible 2 weeks ago.

So, yes, we’re making tough decisions and delivering tough news. We’ve all got our concern radar turned up, in the background all the time. You, your team, your family, and everyone around you is being pushed in ways we haven’t before- how we work, how we interact, how we look at our own invincibility, and even how we look into our refrigerators. 

People are checking social media and news more times per hour than ever before, because we’re all looking for something to be guided by. 

This is where YOU come in as a leader, right now.

While I’m known to get straight to the truth of what nobody wants to talk about (those elephants in the room), I also reflexively scan for cracks in the wall we seem to be facing, where light can get through. I’m a light-finder that way. Once I find those cracks, everything else gets easier, like an airway opening up to what’s on the other side– thinking gets clearer, ideas line up faster, next steps appear easily, breaths deepen and smooth out. 

This compulsion to find the light is helpful when things get dark or panicky, or in coaching a team through change or uncertainty, focusing people on the upside and what’s constructive in the face of what’s scary and stressful. While you may not do that naturally, it’s a learnable skill, and pretty clutch for you and your team right about now.

Here’s how…

Scan for light. 

People get pulled by all that’s bad, unsettling or disappointing. That’s normal, and means they’re still based in reality, which is really important to establish grounding. As you call your team together, call out what’s actually occurred, developed, and is daunting first… that’s important in order to solve for it all, and… realism. Yet negative energy is more powerful (unfortunately) than positive energy, so the key for all the people looking to you for direction, is what you do next. Rather than staying there in what’s daunting, intentionally look for (and call out) what’s good, what’s unexpectedly poignant, what’s purely positive in this, even if it’s tiny. Look for something that actually couldn’t have been true or noticed if this hadn’t happened. People connecting, team supporting one another in new ways, communities coming together on their balconies to sing and cry together, more efficient ways to work together which we’ll carry on long after this passes…

The smallest crack can let through the most illuminating light.  

Bonus: Make this a daily practice- scan and call out new ones every day (can’t be what you said yesterday). We know that daily practices like this actually increase happiness, training the brain to scan in the background of conscious attention for new good, when it wouldn’t otherwise.

Check your energy. 

Energy travels, and is contagious. We pick up, and are affected by other people’s energy in what they say, yet also in their tone, posture, facial expression, cadence, silence, and so many invisible, yet palpable frequencies and vibrations (hence the “vibe” we reference or joke about). That energy is real and people are picking up yours as a leader, and being influenced by it, whether you’re conscious of it or not. Some people are much more sensitive to it than others, yet in times of culture stress (like now), everyone feels it more. That on-edge-ness you might be feeling is translating to others, no matter how you try to mask it; so shift it instead of masking it. 

You’ve heard me talk about State– where you are mentally, emotionally and physically at any moment; this might be an easier way to think about your energy, and it’s much more manageable than you think. So- now, more than ever before… tune in, calm yourself with a few deep, even breaths (classic State change), and choose to be the version of yourself which you know shines in a way that’s additive to others. Maybe the Problemsolver vs. the problemfinder, or the Ideator vs. thevictim?  

Bonus: Daily practices like Miracle Morning, or even just taking 5 minutes to calm and clear your mind are gamechangers.

Choose where to focus.

Picking a focal point on the wall to look at while jumping on a trampoline creates equilibrium in your head, preventing (or curing) dizziness and disorientation without stopping you. As disruption and change happen, your team needs its own kind of focal point too, to stay clear of and prevent (or cure) the disorientation that can easily ensue. So, after you check your own energy, focus it on the blue visible just to the other side of the clouds. That light coming through has a source, so go there. Jump ahead, past this wall, past the current challenge… all the way out to the hindsight that will come afterward, and the next chapter. Having crushed the current challenge, what will you and the team have conquered or discovered or gained as capacity in going through all of this? 

Looking to that focal point of light coming through can act powerfully like that spot on the trampoline jumper’s wall for you and your team right now.

Reframe it. 

When someone puts a new frame on the same picture we’ve all been looking at, suddenly the whole thing looks different. Like wearing tinted glasses, most of us don’t even realize when the filter we’re looking through has normalized everything into looking grey. We take them off, and things that weren’t apparent before, now pop. Details that blended in before now strike you as gamechangers. Great leaders cut through a culture’s groupthink to paint possibility, reframing the whole thing to help us to see it differently. Your team needs that from you right now.  

Try sentence starters like…

“This could be an opportunity to…” 

“What if we looked at this as…”

“What if we…” 

“Imagine that we looked back on this and…”

Use the MAP. 

True always, yet especially now, keeping people engaged (not isolated), switched on (not going dark) and motivated (not defeated) is critical. You can actually do that with every communication, if you remember M.A.P. 

As humans, we have lots of core drives, yet picture the 3 most powerful drives (as Daniel Pink writes about so powerfully in his book Drive) to follow here are like 3 light bulbs in each person’s core… your goal is to get each of them switched on. They’re naturally on when people are fired up, yet you can also turn them on when they’re not… 

M = Mastery. Acknowledge someone’s mastery of skill, knowledge, or talent, and this drive comes on. The other less-obvious part of the mastery drive, is feeling progress toward accomplishment. We’re wired for forward movement, and maybe the hardest aspect of our current situation is the universal brakes it has put on everyone and everything. Yes, slowing down periodically is good when we choose it, yet being stuck standing still or stagnant or in limbo is bad, and shuts down our mastery drive. So… find ways for people to feel like they’re making progress forward. This won’t be in big jumps on metrics and accomplishment, yet shouting out any steps forward do the trick in keeping that mastery drive switched on. 

A = Autonomy. We humans love/need choice. While we tend to think of autonomy as how much free reign/leash/space we have, this core drive is even simpler than that; moment to moment, decision to decision, people need to be able to say to self, “I’m doing this because I CHOOSE to.” Every time they can do that, the autonomy drive switches on. Leading your people in any situation, this is the difference between telling someone to do something and asking/challenging/inviting them to do it. Zero autonomy: “Get xyz done by the end of the day.” vs. Open autonomy: “We need xyz by the end of the day. Can you take it?” On the receiving end of each of these, the difference is palpable; My choice = All in.  

P = Purpose. Feeling that what we do matters in furthering something bigger than ourselves which we care about, in the great scheme of things, taps into the fundamental core drive of Purpose. This is the Big WHY in whatever we’re doing. It’s most easily skipped when we’re in tactical mode, (focusing more on whens and hows), yet the most important piece to start with, as it answers the basic question people always have (in choosing whether or not to care) immediately, allowing them to get onboard immediately.

Every leader thinks about how they’ll respond when they really need to step up and lead a team through adversity. Each day we’re in right now is unprecedented, which means THIS is the moment you’ve been prepping for. Great leaders can deliver tough news while they also bring inspiration, help you refocus, and tap into your best.

Now is the time, and you are the leader. 

And I am here, as always, ready to support and coach you and your team as needed.

Let’s GO! 

Your Team's Check-In Can Maximize EVERYthing Else They Do. Actually.

“Is there one thing I could do with my team, to boost/ smooth dynamics, unblock thinking, loosen tension, elevate trust, generate ideas, address issues, improve process and accelerate productivity… all at once?”

YES, there is, and this is the #1 question I’m asked most frequently by leaders. 

That one thing is the Check-In, and I’ve used it five times in the last week alone to help teams accelerate. If you’re thinking that you’re already “checking in” with your team all the time because you talk to one another and coordinate all day long… Well… that’s actually not the same thing.

For efficiency and flow, you need a simple, intentionally-structured check-in process, designed to quickly get straight to what needs to be surfaced for everyone to gather speed forward with clarity and progress. I’ve got options for you….

You already know from experience that you can talk with someone every single day without ever broaching the one thing that really needs to be addressed and could shift everything (let alone all the small things that could be tightened up, tweaked or improved), right? Some people are so confronted by the idea of broaching that “one thing” that they’d rather quit their job than address it directly. So, let’s get the drama out of it, and set you up to easily get things up and OUT, accelerating your team forward with every check-in, yes?

Consider: 

You and your teammates are moving quickly, sometimes in rhythm, sometimes not. It’s easy to assume alignment when there isn’t, to get frustrated about small things, and swallow issues instead of working through them directly. These accumulate fast, and weigh the team down. We see signs: quality of work stagnates as “good enough”; folks going through the motions vs. pushing anything/one to excellence; the team dynamic gets shallow or transactional; people withdraw, playing it safe/small, their emotional armor assembled (“if they’re not going to put it out there, then I’m not either,” says the voice in our heads). In order for you and your team to achieve maximum results and impact, you want each person to be playing full-out, right? That requires a combination of trust and sync with one another, with openness of communication. Research now validates that, across the board, if those aren’t there, people hold back, consciously and unconsciously.  This is the core of psychological safety, which is the single biggest difference in teams that accelerate and thrive vs. teams that don’t. These models will help build it.

First, Own it…

No matter which tools you use to check in, the association and vibe you build into your culture has to be one that keeps things moving; help your avoiders cut right to it, and your confronters to lighten up a bit and keep focusing forward. Adopt and introduce the mantra of my favorite six words…

The cadence here is key… (I teach it with finger snaps to keep it moving) the message: we’re not dwelling on it, but calling it, anyone who needs to own it will vocally and quickly (whatever’s necessary to repair trust, etc.), and we are moving forward, on to the next! Teams love this mantra, because it keeps the somewhat uncomfortable process of talking about what’s not working… moving right along without dragging it out. Like ripping a bandaid off.

ALSO... For any of the tools in the rest of this article to work, you as the leader have to model calling yourself out. You might be used to the role of calling others out, yet we want your team to ideally be calling themselves out, and to do that, they need to see you in full accountability via a little vulnerability (sharing that you’re not perfect) by calling yourself out where it fits, making it safe for them to be honest.

Now, on to the most effective, fastest-moving tools you can integrate into your team’s process… 

1) The Essential 3-Part Check-In

You want your team to be playing full-out every day, with no drama, unspoken funkiness, or repressed upsets slowing them down. Think of this consistent practice as good team hygiene; just like you brush your teeth consistently to keep them healthy, you do this check-in regularly (weekly or monthly) to keep your team healthy. It creates the space for unspokens to get up and out (“so glad we got that called out!”), for progress to be seen (“wow-look how far we’ve come”), and for smart iteration to occur (“awesome idea- this will make a difference right away!”).

How: This is similar to a debrief, yet it’s in real time, as the team keeps moving...

Get the team together. Make 3 columns labeled +, -, Δ

Get people sharing their thoughts by asking the 3 questions about team process:

+ What’s working?

– What’s not working?

Δ   What do we want to change? (in our dynamics, process, etc.)

There are no wrong answers here, and the faster people can get their thoughts up and out, the better. Encourage people to build on one another’s ideas, building the list.

As facilitator, listen carefully to develop a sense of when people need to discuss the points going up, and when they just need to get them all out and up, so you can quickly take action on them.

When: The more you do this, the faster it gets. This can be 10 minutes or 2 hrs, depending on how you facilitate it, and how much is backlogged in the team, which hasn’t been said.

Real life: In the last 10 days alone, working with 5 different high-level teams, this was the process that unlocked things for them and got them productively reset (via me facilitating through a speakerphone). That was just one week. In three decades of helping thousands of teams accelerate, I’ve found this tool to be the singlemost powerful practice for high performing teams.

2) The 3-Part Debrief

Most people know the term debrief, yet few practice it well. High-stakes and quick-learning teams never skip it. Naval Seal teams call it the AAR (After Action Response), and hold it as one of the most important non-negotiable practices of their culture of psychological safety, agile learning and preparedness for anything. The sooner it’s done the better…

After something (like a meeting, a project, a game, a performance, a push, etc.), huddle the team, then use your 3-Part Checkin frame, now a bit differently– this time about how it went…

+ What worked?

– What didn’t work?

Δ   What do we want to change out of this? (that triangle is a Delta sign, which in math means change)

Option: to make it more visual, get everyone over to a whiteboard, make 3 columns of +, –, Δ , and have someone record as the team calls things out.

As the leader, make sure you’re calling out your own minuses right away (“I messed up…”). This instantly opens it up for your team to call and own theirs, too.

The more you do this as practice, people will come to the debrief with pluses, minuses and deltas to share out, and listening open to whatever needs to be said/hear to get better.

At the end, “Awesome… hands in the middle…… GO! “

3) The 3-Part Timeout

If you could stop the clock midway, call out what’s working/not working and adjust to improve things immediately, why wouldn’t you?

Most teams just do the postmortem debrief after something’s done, yet that’s actually too late to do anything to correct or change course in real time, or to get real-time learning from it; so use the 3-point check in midway through a process enables the team to pivot while it still counts! 

How: Similar to the Regular Check-in above, this is the 3-minute, stand-up-huddle version, which anyone can call in the midst of the fray or pressure, bringing the team together to reset quickly on +’s, –‘s, Δ’s.  Call it, adjust, move on! At the end, “Awesome… hands in the middle…… GO! “

I’ve seen this save teams… used in a quick 5 minute break midway through a high-stakes meeting/event, they could laser in to catch key things (good and bad), pivot quickly, and crush the rest of it differently than they ever could’ve without this little framework.

Here, we’ll break away from the 3-Part template, because we need specific tools for specific situations with your team.

4) The Episode Processing Checkin

“Stuff happens,” and people feel the impact. Individuals and teams don’t always have a clean path to process through what happens in a way that acknowledges it and moves them forward constructively and quickly. Having a simple model to facilitate through it easily is gold, and makes the difference between healthy team and dysfunctional team.

When your team has just experienced something big (change, pressure, win, loss)… make it count for something by facilitating constructive meaning out of it for everyone. You can do this with these 4 F’s as your guide. Get everyone in the room, and ask the questions:

1. Facts…  What actually happened?  

2. Feelings… What feelings came up for you? 

3. Findings… What can you learn? Where else do you see this pattern? 

4. Future… What do you want to take away from this or bring into next time? 

You’ve heard of “fail fast,” yet that only works if a fail is processed into a learning, which most teams don’t know how to do quickly or thoroughly. You’ve also heard “celebrate wins,” yet that’s usually just high-fives or happy hour, not also a process designed to transfer the win into more future wins. This gives you a guide to processing both. With it, your team will start actively, vocally learning through experiences together, making faster progress.

*BONUS, if you’re familiar with Circles of Reality, take the team through a Reality Checkin here, getting the circles up on a big whiteboard, and talk them through as a team!

5) The One Word Whip Quickcheck

Sometimes you don’t have time to completely debrief after a great experience with your team. You’ve just finished a process, a win, a day, a week, and you want to give the team some closure, have every person be heard AND facilitate instant processing for them of their experience and meaning making. So…

How: Get everyone together (in a circle is best, so everyone can see everyone else, and they’re not just talking to YOU at the front). Ask everyone to quickly…

“Think of one word to capture this for you.”

(options: one word to capture what you’re taking away from this, what you got out of this, what this means for you)

Then say, “One word from each person… Who will start us off?”

Once the first person shares their word, pick a direction in the circle, and have it “whip” all the way around, each person saying theirs.

No matter what people share… it’s powerful because everyone has a turn and it’s only one word, it pushes everyone’s thinking to rapidly reflect on their experience, check in with themselves and synthesize it all into one word. They then walk away continuing the reflection you began for them, exactly the ripples you want to start. I end every workshop meeting this way; It’s always gratifying for everyone in the circle, often profound, and always a moment of connection for the group.

6) The Daily Standup

Your team, like many, may be dividing and conquering most of their day, not actually working physically together on the same thing at the same time. So… this practice gets a team quickly into one another’s world, and on the same page for the day, so the rest of what they do all day is fueled by an kickstart of connectedness. It also gives everyone a quick visual+verbal+physical start to the day as team, creating mental+emotional resonance for rest of the day. 

First thing in the morning: Huddle the team, at a set time every morning. Whoever’s in the office attends (and all meetings scheduled during that time know that daily standup will interrupt them for just 10 minutes because it’s that important).

Have a standing, engaging agenda, and rotate who’s leading each day. 

Sample agenda: 

1. Burning Issues (anything people need to get up + out for the team to know) “Today’s my birthday!”

2. Move (way to physically + mentally wake everyone up together- could be a stretch, BrainGym or Improv) 

3. Wins (progress made in last 24 hrs) “Our sales are up 5% today!”

4. What/when/where (logistics lineup for day) “Project X is meeting with stakeholders in the space today. Whitney is working remotely today, but is on grid and available.”

5. One word whip (each person quickly picks & says their 1 word for the day, to focus them, fire them up, etc.)   

Now, You…

Healthy, kick-ass teams check in early and often, with process tools like these. It keeps issues cleared out, alignment on track, drama at bay, learnings feeding productivity, and that elusive “team chemistry” actually happening. So can you. You can call timeouts when the pressure is highest– to ensure team momentum, alignment of thought, and approach; you can do it in regular checkins to keeps little issues from becoming obstacles to fast progress, surface essential insights, and pivot to improve the work as you go. This practice will facilitate forward motion for the team, and cement learning, clear out those little things what would otherwise waste energy ruminating and internalizing in the background of their thinking. People hold and replay what’s emotionally vivid for them (good and bad), so now you’ll make sure that all the right things are preserved– keeping what worked so you can replicate it, ditching what didn’t so you don’t repeat mistakes, and declaring what could be different, so you all instantly, intentionally improve.

And now you now have multiple, solid tools to can get your team there, and on their way.

Enough reading… now GO actually check in with your team!!!

You, Playing Big

#1   Let’s go back to a moment in your life...You’re about to take the step, and never have before. Nobody knows how huge this moment actually is except you, because you’re the one feeling your heart race, pores sweat, butterflies flapping in your stomach. Every fiber of your body is on red alert. It’s loud inside your head; your little voice is screaming at you, cajoling you, trying to reason with you... pulling out every trick it knows to get you to STOP. Decision time.

The last moment you had like that may have defined you. Because whether or not you took that step, whatever happened afterward either opened something up or shut something down, which is why you’ll remember it forever. 

#2    Try this:  Cross your arms, and then come back.  Great. Now do that again, except this time cross them the other way (other arm on top this time).  That felt weird, right? You wanted to cross them back the first way, didn’t you?

Welcome to your Comfort Zone.

Your comfort zone is drawn as a box, yet in reality is more like a big bubble that surrounds you, going with you wherever you go. But mentally, developmentally and metaphorically, it’s definitely a box that holds all the things you are used to, comfortable with, unconsciously competent at doing and generally unfazed by.

We already know that your little voice steers you through most decisions, and it’s either working for you, against you or in some other direction completely. While you might have a daredevil little voice, you definitely have another one, who's vested in you being consistently, solidly competent. It looks out into the unknown from inside your comfort zone, and says,  “You’re not going to do that. That is the danger zone! You could fail. You could get rejected. Worst of all, you’re going to look really bad!” That same little voice is very vested in you looking good all the time. Stepping out into that danger zone, you could definitely look pretty bad, even stupid. So we usually don’t. Unless we do.

So, with that, think for a moment about your own comfort zone, and how you protect it in the name of credibility and strength. One of my favorite researchers, Dr. Brene Brown (a vulnerability expert) digs into the conflict of how we view vulnerability in ourselves vs. how we view it in other people. Think about a leader who stands up and shares something personal, who admits a mistake, who visibly takes a step out there, owns it, and then carries on, strong. Universally, we’re inspired by that, yet we don’t want to do it ourselves, right? Brown points out that we tend to see vulnerability as “courage in you, but weakness in me.” A dilemma, right? Brown asserts that “Vulnerability may actually be our most accurate measure of courage. In 15,000 pieces of data, I could not find one instance of courage that wasn’t completely underpinned by vulnerability.”

SO... How could you step out, showing some human vulnerability (and therefore courage) to blaze the trail for your team to step out? It’s time. 

What have you been avoiding, working around or wishing you could do?  Where do you know you need to push yourself into the growth zone?  Where are you playing small? If you’re feeling a little discomfort thinking about it, you’re on the right track. So, it just depends on where your little voice pops up, and starting to challenge it in order to take on that box, and bust through.

This gets tricky as your "leadership position" gets more prominent. The stakes of your decisions get higher, the value of your expertise and mastery more focused. You've spent a lot (time, work, rungs) earning that credibility, so the tendency is to do what you can to stay solidly in that expertise. That’s very different from you in the growth zone, which feels squishier. Stepping out feels vulnerable, so you might stretch your CZ, but only on your own time, when nobody can see, so they don’t have to see you flail. Except if your people never see you stepping out, they never get the model or see you as human, and don’t feel permission to do it themselves. That's not good, and when I get called in later to a dysfunctional culture where people are hiding mistakes, trying to look perfect, imperfectly.

How to expand your zone...

Mark your territory.  What are some things that you know you already do well or comfortably as a leader? This list can be as comprehensive as you want it to be. If you want to write a volume on this subject, go for it, but take a few minutes to map them out; it’s important to get clear about what’s already inside your comfort zone and get your strengths so you can build from there. Next, call out where you need to step out. Own it. 

Look around.  A great way to identify areas to stretch outside your comfort zone is to look at other leaders and the moves they make which you don’t. Or recall situations in which you’ve thought, “Ugh, I wish I could do that,” or “This is not a strong area for me,” or even “Not my style.” ...All big red flags. Then pick one. Or a few.

Step out enough.  Make sure you’re actually stretching yourself to step out in a way that will challenge and stretch your ability to play life bigger, influence further, thrive more solidly. So, while putting my clothes away more often might be different from my norm, it’s not a comfort zone issue. I avoid putting my clothes away because I just don’t like to do it — not because it’s a stretch for me. Pick a true stretch. 

Hold the tension. So is bigger always better? Not necessarily. This isn’t about jumping into the unknown everywhere with reckless abandon—that’s volatile leadership, which you don’t want. Great leaders are strategic and focused, but not limited by their boundaries, which takes a delicate balance of agility. Holding that tension between playing to your strengths and stepping out of your Comfort Zone to expand it takes self-awareness, willingness to call oneself out, and ability to learn efficiently and voraciously. Flex.

Map it.  Write down what the benefit of doing this is for you—what might you have, which you don’t yet? A new confidence, ability to let it go, new domain in your wheelhouse? Then identify what you’ll need to do specifically and different than what you’ve been doing; Have the conversation instead of just thinking about it? Put the ideas out there instead of waiting to be asked? Try out what you know is possible instead of hoping someone else goes first? And finally, identify the key piece; for you to do this, what version of yourself will you need to be (brave? confident? strong? grounded? human?). 

Big yet not so big. Some of the steps you need to take are one-shot-deals; those tough conversations, moments, hurdles you just need to take on rather than waiting for "the right time" (which never appears). That's a whole other category, to check out HERE.

Push it.  You spent more time on the ground, falling than you did upright as you learned to walk. Don’t just step out one time. Do it as many times as you need to, making sure to tweak and refine each time, until you can say, “I can do this,” and can add it to your repertoire. The number one way people keep themselves from a bigger game is quitting too soon. It doesn’t work immediately and/or looks silly, so we do it a couple more times, and then say, “Yeah—that’s enough,” chalking it up to "that's not who I am." But maybe it was really too soon to tell! Keep going.

The bigger your comfort zone, the bigger your opportunity for uninhibited impact. That’s what we want for you—no situation that you come upon where you say, “I don’t think so” just because it’s new territory. You’re playing big and taking it on, as influencers do.

©SarahSinger&Co. 2016

The Pyramid of Perspective

How many times have you gotten sucked into the stress of someone else’s timeline or pushed out a time-sensitive directive to your team focusing all on the WHENs and details of HOW you wanted/needed it done. This occurs on teams and in leadership daily, and our perspective gets lost. One of the most effective ways to channel the brilliance of your team while grounding it to something solid is to continually give them perspective on their process.  Think of it like a Pyramid of Perspective…

So, where’s your vantage point?  Each of the levels on this pyramid represent different viewpoints of perspective.  In the way that you lead and communicate, you can come from any of the levels of the pyramid, each one coloring your message and influence differently.  The deeper you go on the pyramid, the more foundation of grounded perspective you bring to the team.  As a leader, you’ve got some choices…

Even more on this in Chapter #13 of TapIntoGreatness!

WHEN- Coming from this place, you’re concerned with time (usually never enough), the schedule and the deliverable deadlines.  For a competitive team, When is an important and effective driver for them to get to their results and come together before another team beats them to it.  High achievers often do their best work under pressure, so time and an impending constraint of When can bring out their best. As a leader, it’s important that you leverage that as a motivator without becoming the watch-checker. If you cross that line to become overly concerned with time, your team can dismiss you as valuing time over content or process quality.

• Build and show timelines to give your team a sense of how their process will play out in concrete terms, and give them a sense of “we are here” on the map.

• Adjust the timeline as you go, making space for their emergent process as they collaborate.

• Strategically, use time and deliverables to create urgency when needed. Deadlines spur action.

HOW- Here, the focus is on the process, the steps and the way we get there. If you’ve got a team of individuals coming from successful yet diverse disciplines and experiences, the How will be important to them. They can get stuck on How your team is approaching the work, attached to a particular process to achieve results from their previous world. I’ve seen potentially brilliant teams crumble because they couldn’t get aligned on process.  How your team goes about its impressive disruption is ultimately your call as the leader. It’s critical, because How your team does its magic may be the very thing that sets you apart from your competitors and defines your brand. Yet if you’re overly skewed on form and checking off every box just so, they’ll feel micromanaged and stifled, without enough creativity.

• Direct the approach, honoring and incorporating their expertise, then getting their buy-in on why X is the best way for the team. As the leader, be the keeper of the process.

• Get alignment on it early, check in and adjust course often, looking to make sure the How is tapping their talent consistently and providing a way for it to manifest in great work.

WHAT- This is the outcome or result you’re going for. Achievers and concrete thinkers on your team will always need this to be as clear as possible. If it’s not, they’ll each come to the team’s work with their own interpretation of What you’re trying to accomplish, which can be problematic when they clash with one another. While they each may hold their own important piece in the puzzle, they all need to be working toward the same picture on the box lid to guide them together. Clear focus on the What elevates the team’s dynamic and conversation to a common goal and a reason to rally in collaboration. The more vividly they’re able to envision the outcome they’re going for, the more they’ll be pulled to it, causing the How and When to fall into place to make it happen.

• Get What your team is going for- the change you’re trying to impact- clear and concrete.

• Have the team articulate the goal, get it visually up on the wall of your workspaces, and keep reiterating it for them.

• If the result you’re going for is ambiguous, then set shorter term What milestones along the course for them to focus on and hit.

WHY- All the layers of the pyramid are key in keeping your team and the work focused on the right things at the right times. And Why is is the one that makes the difference between managing and really leading people. The Why both trumps and grounds everything above it on that pyramid, because it gets to the heart of motivation.  This could be what brought them all onboard with you in the first place- a mission to ________ (fill in accordingly). It’s their cause, their call, their drive to do the work and push through to the other side. It brings it all back to purpose which is energizing, clarifying and even calming.  For you as the leader, getting the Team Why clear and articulated is the most important thing of all, after which everything else (What, How and When) is about execution.  This is the conviction that makes the game matter, and the impact of their efforts bigger in the world. It’s what engages these individual brilliant people on your team, bringing their separate Whys and visions of what’s possible in the world to this work together.

• As a leader of disruption, you see the layers of Why to the work. Sort and prioritize them, then keep bringing it back to focus for your team.

• Lead your team with the Why. Tell the Why. Ask the Why. Every time, every conversation, every day.

• Open with the Why, then layer the What, How and When on top.

THE BIG WHY- The deepest level of individual personal drive we all have is our Big Why… why we’re doing this in the great scheme of life. This is our biggest game, truest purpose, greatest good and what gets us out of bed in the morning.

Steve Jobs: “To make a dent in the universe.”

As a leader, get clear about yours. Once you do, it will come through as the passion that fuels everything else you do, and will serve as inspiration for every person you lead.

You also need to get  … their individual Big Whys. Once you know their WHY, it can be very powerful, giving you a way to frame communication with them- an entrance into their world at any moment.  When they’re in need of motivation, acknowledgment or perspective, you can frame it in the most meaningful way for what matters most to them.  Their why is their buy-in, and your why can be their inspiration.

Once you’re grounded in this deepest, most stable part of the pyramid, the others- WHAT, HOW, and WHEN are easy to reference and command as needed, because they’re truly held in perspective of the biggest Why.

• If you don’t already know them, find the Big Whys for each on your core team… by asking them!  While this is getting to what’s most essential to people’s core, many don’t talk much about it or even think of it consciously to the level of easy articulation. Getting them to unearth it will help them get more passionate about what their doing, and help you to lead them more accurately.

• As you ask, know that these questions are the kind that may require people to search a little internally for if they haven’t already clarified it for themselves. Give them space to think about it and then ask in layers…

You may ask them, “So why do you do this?”

They may say, “because I’m intrigued by X kinds of challenges,” or some other such practical but not meaningful answer.

You then follow up simply with, “Why are these kinds of challenges intriguing to you?”

They might answer, “Because I really care about X…”

You probe, “Why do you care so much about X?”

…until you’ve asked five levels into their Why. Think of it as helping them peel the layers back on the onion of their Big Why, getting down to their most fundamental Big Why beneath.

As you lead and manage every day, the art of it is to keep perspective for yourself and your team. When, How, What, Why are each important in different ways,  can demand its own hyper focus, and can become consuming if you’re not careful.   Picture yourself as standing at any level on the pyramid, grounded at that level,  easily able to reach every level above it. If you’re standing all the way up in When, you can’t even see, let alone reach the others below you. The deeper you go on the pyramid, the better your perspective is, allowing each of the other levels to fall into place. Standing and starting with Why, you can layer, reference, tap and pull from What, How and When easily, without getting sucked in to them and losing your vantage point.

Your perspective colors how you choose, lead and relate… so keep yourself grounded.

©SarahSinger&Co. 2013

Up and Out...

Eyes up and out…

I thrive on horizons.  It’s all over most of my writing, speaking and coaching.  That’s my strength- always seeing or creating the horizon, no matter the situation- for others, for myself, for challenges. The path to get from here to there comes easily, too- my brain automatically conjures several ways at once.  The challenge for me actually occurs when I have to look down. I got that today.

As I set out for a run, most of my normal path was covered with snow and ice- not treacherous, but enough that I had to slow down and really pay attention to every step to avoid falling.  I HATED it. Crazy how much I hated it.  Breathing harder, working to get traction and tensed up as I navigated the right places to land and push off, I found myself completely irritated that I was spending so much energy to go slower when I really wanted to just look up and out at the horizon and run full out toward it.

Gee- a little metaphor, there?  So much about leadership, what it takes to make progress, and of course how I’m wired.

Understanding the focal point that gives you strength is key. 

Part of what it takes to lead and make change happen is being able to see and hold a focal point of what’s possible and where we’re going. Call it vision, horizon, the long view- a future state of what’s possible that’s different from where we are right now. This is critical. Organizations, teams and relationships without this can get mired in what is or what’s always been, which can lead to stagnation, circular issues and overall fatigue. Someone’s got to be able to look up and out of it, see possibility, help everyone else see and focus it vividly, and hold it as the focal point to progress toward.  It’s not that we ignore the present, don’t honor the past or are never looking down, but the pull has to be more forward to the horizon than down at each step on the path.

That ratio of focus is important- notice it. 

Looking primarily down at where to place each step at a time is a different kind of focus.  It’s deliberate, slower and careful. It’s necessary too- so we don’t actually get taken down by landing on some little slippery patch of detail along the way because we’re not paying attention to what we’re doing tactically, step by step.  Having people who are wired to focus this way is critical to balance any good leadership team.  While I can do this, I know it’s not where my patience or strength lie at all… so I really value the people on my team who bring this present, careful step-at-a-time thinking first.  They offer ballast to my horizon.

The key is finding some balance in focal points.  

The first half of the run was miserable, because I was spending more time looking down than up, muscling my way through it to think tactically about each step without losing too much momentum. I kept going because I knew it was only necessary for so long before I could get traction again to accelerate. This is sometimes how I lead, too. I’ll muscle my way through the deliberate slowness (often impatiently) until I can get the necessary traction (right team, right support, right game) to accelerate toward what’s possible again. Then my strength as a leader comes out, and my energy can carry us all forward quickly.

By the second half of the run, I was able to balance a bit more- looking down at my steps, then up at my horizon more equally. Probably more down than I prefer, but doable. Just that little ratio increase of up and out vs. down and narrow helped tremendously.  It actually made me tactically more deft in the moment, able to navigate nimbly and quickly. Toggling between horizon and steps, long view and details, strategy and tactics in running or leading- connects the whole picture enough for my energy to increase, thinking to clear a bit and stride to relax.

Just that added bit of what energizes can be enough to carry and fuel the rest. 

When I finally got back to dry path for the last few legs of my run, I couldn’t help but notice how everything shifted. My gait, my speed, my breath all smoothed, and I accelerated. My thinking opened up, my ideas started flowing again, and I found my stride. Of course I had my direct steps in peripheral sight and looked down to maneuver smartly as needed, but most of my focus was up, out and forward. I was reminded of how instantly fulfilled and impactful I can be when my focal point is where I’m strongest… on the horizon, where possibility is.

This explains why I love the last stretch of every run, including today’s. It’s where I run down the middle of my street, focusing on a precise horizon- the very top of a 4-story tree at the end of the road.  As I do, I quit pushing and become pulled by that treetop, sprinting full out, 100%. Everything peripherally falls away, all the best ideas in my head come together, and I hit my personal best… as I always do with a horizon that’s clear, magnetic and vivid.  Those moments of going full-out with everything I’ve got are exhilarating, symbolic of what’s possible and what we can pull out of ourselves, and definitely what I love the most.  On all of my paths, slogging through the rest to get to that as a person and as a leader is worth it every time.

Find those moments of personal best- both fulfilled and impactful- to make all the rest worth it along your path.

©SarahSinger&Co. 2013

Talent vs. Strength

Strengths and Talent are two different things.  Strengths are what you do easily and regularly, without thinking about it.  These usually come from talent.  Yet we all have talent that isn’t necessarily manifesting as strength.  It may come out in moments or episodes of brilliance, but isn’t reliably consistent yet. While a lot of my work is in the former, what I’m most interested in is the latter.

Strengths.

In some ways, strengths are the low-hanging fruit of my coaching work.  Most people don’t truly realize what their strengths are, or why they’re so amazing.  We’re all too close to have any perspective on it.  Someone with a strength like being able to establish instant rapport and agreement with others doesn’t really acknowledge it as a strength, because it’s as instinctive as breathing for him or her, yet enviable, difficult and a mystery to another person watching. The groundbreaking work of Clifton and Buckingham in this realm has been a gamechanger for millions- so much so that I require groups and teams to take StrengthFinder as a prerequisite for any work I do with them.  We have to at least surface, understand and leverage what we all do well without effort before we start working on how we can grow in new ways.  Simply getting people to be more conscious of what they already do well as their unique and important contribution, and to confidently leverage it as such is groundbreaking for most people.  That’s also telling about our society-  that this initial work (which seems like it would be quick and easy) is huge all by itself for people.  For adults, some of this is from becoming desensitized to our own strengths. Our instinct, common sense and lens through which we see the world becomes as invisible to us as the air we breathe, and we accept it as “normal” (and therefore not anything worthy of leveraging). Meanwhile, our personal set of strengths is unique from everyone around us (and could be genius to them).  It also has a lot to do with our pre-occupation with what we’re not, and what we should be (“Yeah, but if only I were more X…”), rather than an ownership and confidence in what we are, and how we’re uniquely brilliant- and the value of either. The a-ha that people and teams have when they suddenly see their own talent-strength that’s been there all along under those layers is awesome and empowering.

I do love coaching strengths, yet secretly love and crave more, as all coaches do.

Talent.

Great movies love to depict the classic inspirational story of the semi-retired coach or trainer who comes back into the game to develop a wild, raw undeveloped talent into something solid, something strong.  Million Dollar Baby, The Karate Kid, Rocky, Any Given Sunday, Tin Cup, A League of Their Own, The Replacements, even Star Wars…

There’s something different there- much more intriguing, exciting and possible.  This is why my favorite work is with youth vs. adults- it’s much more about working with the talent itself and honing while exploding it vs. working to clear away the layers of stuff on top of it.

Raw talent all by itself is a different thing- it’s trickier.  It’s less predictable and a little rougher around the edges than a bona-fide strength.  Talents can absolutely develop into strengths through deliberate or naturally occurring practice and investment- think Tiger Woods spending more practice time than those with half his talent, because he gets the deliberate path.  How that talent gets developed is one of my favorite topics to think about, coach and experiment with.  Different personalities need to approach it different ways. An awesome article today powerfully shows how even at the top- among the best of the best of the best in a particular field of talent, this happens differently.

But it starts with one thing, which is the most important part… realizing that you have the talent, then deciding that you want more and are ready to explode it into a strength. Maybe it’s just manifesting as an unsettledness now- pay attention to that feeling, and dig into it a little further. Then find the coach, the environment, the team, the training to shape it.  You can do this, and you should, only because you know deep-down that you can, and if you don’t you’ll be forever haunted by “what if I had…”

There’s one more piece in the getting-your-own-talent puzzle, even though it deserves its own day and post.  Personally, I always come back to the most basic piece in developing talent and reaching mastery in any arena- surround yourself with those who ask more of you than you do of yourself.  That means people who challenge you to not just be happy with what you’ve always done, but pushing you to get better, go farther, dig deeper- all from a true commitment to what’s possible in you because they get your talent.  Of course having a good coach or mentor is important, but it’s just as important to look at who else you’re surrounding yourself with.

Pay attention to your unsettledness, consider your own level of talent and mastery, check out who you’re surrounding yourself with, and start building your strength. It’s time.

©SarahSinger&Co. 2012

BEing change vs. LEADing change

“Be the change you want to see in the world…”

While an inspiring (if misquoted) quote and the mantra of change agents universally, there are some serious challenges in the fine print of this theme for some of us leaders.

In BEing that change I want to see in the world, I’m responding, reacting and choosing from that place. I’m getting it done, making waves and causing change. There’s big impact  all the time- directly and in ripples, and nearly always in a good way. From it comes fulfillment for me (and some adrenaline, too) and growth for others.

This is great as a consultant, as I’m often brought in for this very purpose- to offer/uncover/strategize ways forward to shift it all. On it. Got it. Love it.

As a leader of or in an organization though… it’s definitely a bit different.

Modeling the mindset and behaviors you want others to follow is key. And yet, when they are coming from a place of non-change (don’t see the need, don’t want to, don’t have the impulse…) a funky dynamic starts to happen which we can miss altogether if we’re not paying attention.  In BEing the change as a leader, you’re stirring pots, setting the bold new direction, creating the game-changing strategy, challenging the box in every interaction and going out to get the new opportunities for the organization to rise to.

Except they might not.

Here’s the rub- the reason you’re so valued and appreciated (if not also regarded with a dose of discomfort) is because “you are making it happen”- that’s your role- which means that they don’t have to learn how to initiate change on their own.  They can just let you do that scary part, and then step into the opening you’ve created.  But what happens when you’re not there to initiate it?

See if you recognize this pattern… You come in to make change or get things going, you do so full-out, push the boundaries, set new standards and rock their world until “my work here is done” or “I’ve outgrown them” or you’re just plain crispy, and then you move on to another project, place, etc. where they need you more and you can make that big difference.

In your wake, the question remains in each of those places- did you CAUSE change or actually LEAD it?

In causing it, your change-agent way pushes people out of their comfort zone, which can result in a few different  scenarios…
A) It can stick- they love life outside the comfort zone, rise to it, and the whole organization’s pattern and standard for growth changes (our fantasy).

B) It can make them dependent on you manually pulling them out of that comfort zone over and over (tired, anyone?).

C) It can cause them to step out so uncomfortably that they retreat back in when you’re not there, ultimately impacting no lasting change at all (that head against the wall sensation).

To lead change means to influence people to step up and out of their comfort zones, but then to choose to do that repeatedly until they “get” the wonder and possibility of life/opportunity outside that box they were in before.  The test of your impact as a leader should be what they choose to do in the moments when you’re not there to initiate it.

Easier said than done, and MUCH easier to just be and make the change yourself, right?

So the question of the day is… How to LEAD change? Check out Tap Into Greatness and the immersive experiential version too, if you haven’t yet. Meanwhile, start with some awareness. Own the fact that you’re the change agent, and ask yourself what you can say/do/ask to make life outside the box more compelling than in for folks you’re leading. Pose the “why step out,” question in a compelling way, and start getting them to answer it. We all know you’ve already answered the question five different ways in your head 10 minutes ago, which is why they’ll be painfully slow in answering for awhile. Yet until they do, it’s still just your idea and you being the change for them.

So shhh, ask again- a few different ways and really give them some (maybe uncomfortable but necessary) pause to answer it, instead of answering every time for them. Have them imagine and inquire into the possibility on the other side change. They can do this, and want to deep down, or you wouldn’t still be there. Let’s just start with that, and then we’ll build…

©SarahSinger&Co. 2012